Monday, September 29
This WAS my porch...
There never ceases to be excitement in my life!
12:30 AM Sunday I am startled awake by some sort of vibration. Craig and I both jump out of bed. "Something hit the house" I said it twice. I went to the window above the porch in my daughter's room and Craig went downstairs. I said it all looked fine. nothing on the street. The I heard Craig saying "What is going on?, What happened?" And people outside saying is everyone alright? Craig said call the cops, but I didn't even know what was going on yet. I grabbed the phone looked on the porch and saw the SUV in front of my door and some of my neighbors who heard the squealing of tires and the crash. Thank God, no one was hurt. The driver ran. The witnesses saw him running down the street, but because no one saw him in the car or actually get out of the car, it is considered a hit and run with no driver. The guy gets a ticket for "driver responsibility"; a whopping $350, and has to pay to get his car out of hock. Whoopie. What ever happened to taking responsibility for your actions? *sigh* I have a smashed house. The floor is smashed, the glass is smashed, the two cement pillars are cracked and who knows about the integrity of the house yet. We'll have to see. Oh, well. Thankfully, I didn't have an SUV in my living room, right? Or it wasn't during the day while I getting the mail or something like that! Ha, and my mailbox wasn't touched! lol
Craig usually parks where the guy went up on the lawn but wasn't parked there because he got a ticket the other day for someone else cutting the 08 sticker off his plates so he was parking in the vacant lot across the street! Thank you , Lord!
The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed "Subsequential Internal Non-Morality," or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.
Some other symptoms include:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental Component
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect. The Repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
The number to call for repair in all areas is:
Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component.
No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:
9. Self control
Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers' Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.
DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.
Thank you for your attention!
Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may contact the Father any time by "kneemail".