Lazy.
No, I'm not completely lazy, but there is definitly some laziness in me.
I spent an hour or so last night writing out all the verses I could find in regards to laziness. I thought that it was a good place for me to start.
Seems from what I read the lazy person is wasteful and makes tons of excuses not to do work and then complains when they don't have the fruit of their labor (that they didn't do). Yes, in ways that sounds like me. I'd rather not go into details of how it's like me, but it is. Not big issues, like getting up int he morning, but just not having my priorities in order, takes me away from the work God has set before me and I choose to spend my time doing other things. Then I tend to find myself complaining that other things are quite the way they should be, because I am choosing to do other things-not sinful things- just other things so the things I want to have done don't get done. Know what I mean?
For example, if I know I need to be spending more time in my schooling, but then decide the I need to clean up the copper legs of my living room table, I really am choosing to clean the table because I am tired of school work. Is this good? No, I don't think so. Of course, it all falls into I know what my attitude is when I choose to do the other things. I need to be diligent in the other things and then leave the non-important things for later.
Prov. 13:4 The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing but the soul of the diligent is made fat.
Prov. 20:4 The sluggard does not plow after the autumn so he begs during the harvest and has nothing.
Prov. 19:15 Laziness casts into a deep sleep and an idle man suffers harm.
Prov. 22:13 The sluggard says, "There is a lion outside; I will be killed in the streets!"
I need to stop making excuses for my lack of desire to do the things I know I should. There's no lion out there, except myself and my fleshly desires.
I want joy, peace and contentment in all areas of my life. My heart feels heavy and I'm not sure why. But this seems like a good place to start.