Barleans Greens Supplement oops
lol
This is a review for a vitamin supplement. According to this guy,
I will feel the effects of
him taking it and
I'll stay regular to boot! HA! I can save myself the $20!!
"You can feel the surge of energy about 5 min. after i take it and you will stay regular."
RECALLED!
The Maker of all human beings is recalling all units manufactured, regardless of make or year, due to a serious defect in the primary and central component of the heart. This is due to a malfunction in the original prototype units code named Adam and Eve, resulting in the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect has been technically termed "Subsequential Internal Non-Morality," or more commonly known as S.I.N., as it is primarily expressed.
Some other symptoms include:
1. Loss of direction
2. Foul vocal emissions
3. Amnesia of origin
4. Lack of peace and joy
5. Selfish or violent behavior
6. Depression or confusion in the mental Component
7. Fearfulness
8. Idolatry
9. Rebellion
The Manufacturer, who is neither liable nor at fault for this defect, is providing factory-authorized repair and service free of charge to correct this SIN defect. The Repair Technician, Jesus, has most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. There is no additional fee required.
The number to call for repair in all areas is:
P-R-A-Y-E-R.
Once connected, please upload your burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Jesus, into the heart component.
No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Jesus will replace it with:
1. Love
2. Joy
3. Peace
4. Patience
5. Kindness
6. Goodness
7. Faithfulness
8. Gentleness
9. Self control
Please see the operating manual, the B.I.B.L.E. (Believers' Instructions Before Leaving Earth) for further details on the use of these fixes.
WARNING: Continuing to operate the human being unit without correction voids any manufacturer warranties, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too numerous to list and will result in the human unit being permanently impounded.
DANGER: The human being units not responding to this recall action will have to be scrapped in the furnace. The SIN defect will not be permitted to enter Heaven so as to prevent contamination of that facility.
Thank you for your attention!
GOD
Please assist where possible by notifying others of this important recall notice, and you may contact the Father any time by "kneemail".
2 comments:
Hmmm, not sure I want someone elses activities having that much of an effect on my life. :)
Although I am looking in to a whole body cleanse right now.....I am not sure that I would feel really secure taking this guys advice.
To funny!
lol...
*too funny* :)
I tried the cleanse thing and while I know it has some benefits, it didn't work all the wonders the bottle claimed to work. I DO know that if you do the cleanse with enemas, then it does really work, but I couldn't bring myself to do all that--go through all that.
I found that if I up the fresh, raw veggies and eat less processed foods, ,y body does a more natural, much more gentle cleansing. There's a good book you might want to check out of the libray Eat to Live by Joel Fuhrman. There was a little about him and the book online, but the book is excellent. I am kind of easing myself into this new way to eat, but it all makes total sense. His theory is basically to stay away from processed foods, but his explanations as to why are right on and very clear. (and there's some decent recipes to help put it all into action) My food bill is less and my scale reads less, so it's a good thing all around! lol
Are you still do the WeighDownWorkshop?
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